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Religious Truths


TAOISM:
Shit happens.


BUDDHISM:
If shit happens, it isn't really shit.


HINDUISM:
This shit has happened before.


ISLAM:
If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.


CATHOLOCISM:
Shit happens because you deserve it.


PROTESTANTISM:
Let shit happen to somebody else.


JUDAISM:
Why does shit always happen to us?


TRACKERISM:
Who made this shit? When? Why here? What does it feel like? What does it smell like? What does it taste like? How does it influence its surroundings? Etc. Etc. Etc.